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I
once was hired to organize educational programs for
a large Jewish youth group in the United States .
To overcome any possible stigmas associated with the
word "rabbi" and to encourage the kids to
relate to me without preconceived notions, I asked
the executives to introduce me as just David Aaron,
not as Rabbi David Aaron. They respected
my request, but I was dismayed to read in their newsletter
the following announcement: "We want to welcome
a new member to our staff: David Aaron, our Judaism
specialist."
This
sounded even worse! It made Judaism sound like a rare
disease. Don't we go to specialists when we have a
problem our general practitioner cannot treat? What
do you do with a Judaism specialist? Do you come to
him and say, "I've got this problem with Jewish
guilt. Do you have a cure, Judaism specialist?"
I was in trouble before I even started. I didn't want
my name to have Jewish/Judaism/Rabbi/Hebrew or anything
else like it attached to it. I just wanted to be another
person on the staff. I knew that if I were identified
with Judaism then I would be identified with a lot
of the kids' baggage about being Jewish.
Needless
to say I had a rough time but it was the beginning
of essential lessons I needed to learn.
Twenty-two
years in the field of education has taught me how
to help people unpack their baggage. The first step
is to unlock the suitcase and look at what's inside.
This process involves examining what you think you
already know about Judaism and your issues with it.
If you want to take a spiritual journey then you'll
have to unpack the bags you've been carrying from
a long guilt trip.
It's
hard for people to imagine just how much baggage about
Judaism they really have. Various past experiences,
images, and definitions are actually stifling their
ability to really understand a path to holiness. To
unpack this baggage is to grow.
For
example, most people are unaware of the images that
naturally surface in their mind when they hear the
word "G-d," and they often do not realize
just how oppressive those images are. The same goes
for the word Shabbes (Sabbath), mitzvos
(religious duties) or other words related to
Judaism. They are unaware of the biased images that
are stored in their heads, and when these images surface,
they assume that what comes to mind is reality.
Such
personal biases are the first stumbling blocks to
growth. If you really want to grow, then you must
get in touch with what you think you already know
and be willing to ask whether your perceptions reflect
reality.
HOW
REAL ARE OUR PERCEPTIONS?
Although
we consider our perceptions to be absolute reality,
they are often based on a narrow range of encounters
and experiences. Once we have an experience, we define
it, and categorize it. And once we've categorized
an experience, our definition of it becomes an absolute
that we must work hard to get beyond.
This
is true for many Jewish adults when it comes to G-d,
Judaism, Israel , and Torah. They have already formulated
their definitions and stored them, alongside other
negative images in their heads, without realizing
how deeply engraved these images are, and how they
are stifling their ability to be happy and proud about
being Jewish.
To
illustrate this point, I've often asked people to
describe their image of a Torah sage or a Tzaddik
(holy person). Most people imagine a frail old
man, pale, stooped over and often wearing thick glasses.
Why can't the person also be a woman or a young dynamic
robust fellow? But most people, when they imagine
"Torah sage," or Tzaddik think
of a frail old man.
When
I was growing up, I had a very clear image of a Tzaddik
sage — it came from a picture in my living room
of three rabbis learning Torah. They were very old,
with long white beards and glasses. They were sitting,
bent over, around a table piled with books engaged
in a deep Talmudic discussion. One looked like an
umpire yelling, "You're out!" The other
one looked like he was shouting, "No!" And
the third one seemed to be mouthing, "Oy Vey!"
To
me, that picture was Judaism. I did not want to see
myself in that picture. That picture alone stifled
my openness for getting more involved as a Jew because
I did not like and could not relate to it. Simply,
I did not want to be weak and old. I did not want
to be in that unattractive dark gloomy room, sitting
over a pile of books, involved with some seemingly
irrelevant Talmudic discussion of minute details.
Somebody's unattractive picture was my baggage.
Later
in my life I realized that this picture, which my
parents had bought in Israel , had actually determined
what a Torah Jew looked like to me. For a long time
that picture was my only image of Judaism because
it was engraved in my mind — a graven image, so to
speak. And I had to work to get past it, if I really
wanted to know about God, Torah, commandments, Sabbath,
and other Jewish topics.
A
number of years ago, I had a very personal question
that I wanted to discuss with a Kabbalistic master.
The question was so personal that I was trembling
at the thought of even talking to someone about it.
So I asked around for advice about whom I should consult.
That is how I found out about a great Kabbalistic
master, a Hassidic Rebbe called the Z'viler Rebbe.
Hmm, interesting, I thought. I had never heard of
him and did not know where to find him. But I figured
that he must be in Meah Shearim, the famous Hassidic
neighborhood in Jerusalem . Where else could he be?
I
went to Meah Shearim and started asking around for
the Rebbe from Z'vil. The first person said, "Oh,
wow, the Rebbi from Z'vil! You want to see the Z'viler
Rebbi? Well, you have to go yamina (right),
smola (left), smola, yamina "
— perfect directions. I went left, right, right, left,
and, of course, I got lost.
I
then met someone else on the street and said, "Excuse
me, have you heard of the Z'viler Rebbe?" "Have
I heard of the Z'viler Rebbe? Oy Gevalt, he's such
a holy man — an unbelievable deep soul, wow, wow."
This
man tells me to go left, left, right, right, right,
and I follow his directions. I arrive to find a group
of young kids playing on the street, and I tell them
that I'm looking for the Z'viler Rebbe. The kids say,
"Oy, the Z'viler Rebbi! Oy the Z'viler Rebbi,
oy, oy!"
Finally,
I'm standing in front of the Rebbe's apartment building.
I see a young fellow walking up the stairs and I say,
"Excuse me, I am looking for the Z'viler Rebbe."
He says, "I can take you there."
"Great."
As
we're walking up the stairs I say to this young guy,
"Have you ever met this Rebbe?"
He
says, "You might say so, yes." He gets to
the door and says, "This is where the Z'viler
Rebbe lives."
He
takes the keys out of his pocket, and I say, "You
work for the Z'viler Rebbe? Oh, wow." He says,
"Ahh."
He
opens the door and directs me to a room in the back
of the house. As I'm sitting in the room, all of my
images and fantasies are flying because a Hassidic
master is about to walk in, full of fire, and it's
going to be like lightening!
After
a while, this same young fellow walks into the room,
sits across the desk and says, "Hi, how can I
help you?" I say again, "I'm looking for
the Z'viler Rebbe."
"I'm
the Z'viler Rebbe."
You
can imagine my utter shock.
I
was stuck in what I thought a great Kabbalistic master
must look like. Surely he had to be old. He had to
be intimidating. I had trembled at the thought of
even asking my question, and had the issue not been
so pressing I might have never searched for him —
I would have been too afraid. I was trapped by my
very narrow experiences, which got in the way of my
ability to see reality as it is.
The
Jewish mystical tradition teaches that the archetypical
biblical personality who epitomizes the Tzaddik
is Joseph. And yet when we picture Joseph we
rarely think of him as an old man. He was a young
dreamer. He was dynamic, colorfully dressed, charismatic,
and quite handsome. He was a sage and yet also a statesman.
And yet, even though he became the powerful viceroy
of Egypt , he always humbly had the name of G-d on
his lips.
Funny.
He didn't look religious. But he was.
Rabbi
David Aaron
Author of Endless Light, Seeing G-d, The Secret Life
of G-d, Inviting G-d In, Living a Joyous Life, and
The G-d Powered Life
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